The Reef Girls - Just in case the link doesn't work!
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News Release. Thursday 6th January 2005
TeamJackal link attracts overwhelming hits to website
In a routine update to its website, TeamJackal has linked to http://www.sailhead.com. Within this extreme sailing site, the stunning Reef Girls are featured in a small photo spread causing massive international correspondence with urgent requests for immediate employment. This release therefore takes the unprecedented opportunity to clearly state that the Reef Girls are not employed by TeamJackal; have no affiliation with TeamJackal and are simply part of another website, (whose main topic is actually sailing).
This statement is issued with deep concern for the mental integrity of TeamJackal and of those parties affiliated in any way to TeamJackal, as evidenced by recent communication received from a 70+ year old farmer, until now contentedly living in New Zealand. Readers should note that some of the content of the following transcript may be disturbing / offensive to some.
"Subject: Reef Girls
Heartily approve Reef Girl initiative. Subject viewed as important potential asset to Jackal Division of your Command. Suggest immediate implementation on following lines:
1. Recruitment to be organised locally by (a) word of mouth, (b) discreet approaches to potential sources of talent, e.g. airline hostesses, night club singers, ethnic waitresses, photographic models etc
2. In the unlikely event of insufficient response from above sources, approach (even more discreet) could be made to Russian personnel known to be operating in your area.
3. Objective of paras. 1 & 2 above to be the selection of a shortlist of, say, 25 potential candidates, selected on the basis of visual representation, either through photographic imagery or personal inspection.
4. Initial shortlist to be reduced to 5 (optimum number in relation to size of Team Jackal - one for each crew member and two for the skipper - assuming he is man enough to cope).
5. Final selection of assets to be achieved by introduction of tactile procedures to supplement visual processes outlined in para. 3 - i.e. careful consideration to be given to TEXTURE in addition to shape, size, proportion etc.
6. Para. 5 regarded as key to selection of a successful team. Essential for this stage to be carried out only by experienced and dedicated personnel. Recommend myself as well qualified for this task, and prepared to travel to ME at own expense to fulfil this duty.
7. Suggested deployment of Reef Girls: (a) Stimulation of TeamJackal personnel prior to operation. (b) Distraction of opposing forces by strategic deployment at reefs (standing in water); marks of the course(fishing from anchored dinghies); downwind legs (floundering about in the water simulating drowning). (c) Special services performed for TeamJackal members at the end of a successful competition. (d) Retention of self as Reef Girl Manager recommended in order to ensure successful continuation of TeamJackal operations.
Signed.... [Name withheld] (bags packed and ready to go)"
Ends
Obviously we at TeamJackal find remarks such as the above highly offensive.
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