|
|
....... |
TeamJackal receives a lot of fan mail from all over the world. Some of it is just plainly adoring, while other emails are a lot more interesting. Here's a beauty we recieved just recently:
(12-05-06) Subject: Shapely Russian/Swedish ex lap dancing model seeks 'BunnyJackal' position!
I am very sexxy salling gymnast. I noticed the hunky very salling guys in Jackaoff team web site and wanted to offer my shapely model service to your Jackoff gear. If you like I get the gear on please you send me wet jackoff T shirt and send you best picture you ever had!!!
See you big boys
Ingmar XXX
Dear Igmar,
Thank you for your very well-meaning, if rather short, email. I have to say, most of the team find your comments highly stimulating and are greatly encouraged by your offers (and your use of the word 'very'). In actual fact they're all trying to get cheap tickets to Murmansk at this very moment, (thats close to the Russian/Swedish border near you isn't it?) and have flown down to Dubai to try to arrange 'contacts'. You sound like just the very kind of girl we need at TeamJackal. Athletic, shapely perhaps and obviously rather proficient at your various chosen professions.
But I'm afraid to say, Igmar, that we really can't supply T-shirts ready-wetted. That's no fun at all, plus it costs extra for our couriers as cotton gets really heavy with moisture. No. What we utterly insist on is model services in-situ as it were. You wear the T-shirt; we supply the water.... After we've assessed your statistics. Those are the rules that my crew have always insisted upon. And in their states of heightened testosterone following the receipt of your email, I for one, am not going to argue with them.
But enough of this frivolity. I know that, reading between the lines, you're sincere, honest and just trying to get ahead in this dog-eat-dog world of ours. So please send us your vital statistics with a photograph or two and we'll get back in touch with a view to a possible interview. We can't just accept any tart's first offer, especially when we're not sure about the size of your implants.
Come on Ingmar, for all we know you might be a gender-frustrated architect, living in London. Urgh, you might be into biker shorts, chaps and leather - swimming laps rather than dancing them - for all we know. You'll have to entice the team a bit further before we can even contemplate model release forms or any form of possible contract.
TeamJackal is always careful with new fans. Notwithstanding the foredeck crew's enthusiasm concerning your email, I do hope you understand our position.
|
